Here I am sitting in my allergist’s office waiting for my weekly allergy shot. I’m staring at my computer screen asking myself “does no one care?”
Now, this is not the question I expected to ever pop in my head. It was my last day of full-time employment before becoming a full-time mom and I am questioning everything.
I had planned months for this exact moment. When I would leave the workforce and start my new journey.
As soon as we made this decision I put timelines together for everything.
I even spent weeks finalizing items at work to ensure all my projects were handed off before hanging up the full-time career hat.
I had been waiting for this moment for so long. To be there for my son full time. I knew when I packed up my desk and left the laptop behind that I would feel amazing.
That everyone would be excited to hear of my new change.
So how did I truly feel walking to my car all alone on a cold Fall Colorado day? Gloomy. Just like the weather.
No one cares. Why should they?
This is only a major life moment such as your wedding day. But at this moment, unlike your wedding day, no one is around asking how you are feeling. They aren’t taking your photo or pouring you a glass of champagne to cheers your new chapter.
Rather, I am alone at the least celebratory spot imaginable, a doctors office, waiting to get pollen shot into my arm.
I had thought the world would be waiting to give me a big hug and everyone would be knocking at my door to ask how I am feeling about leaving the career world behind.
You may be thinking that I built up expectations in my head and to tell you the truth I probably did.
However, I believe that when a mother transitions from having a full-time career in the office to having a full-time career in the home, there is every reason to celebrate.
Why I Made This Choice
This was MY choice. Just as we make choices to change companies, move into a new house, or buy a new car.
This decision was all my own and no one else’s. I came to my husband wanting to be the one teaching my child and helping him develop and grow.
Trust me I had every reason not to make this life change.
We had a full time live in nanny, dual incomes that provided a very comfortable lifestyle, and a well-oiled machine when it came to our families schedule.
Why throw that all away? Because the moment I came home from a long day at the office and heard my son call our nanny (whom by the way we adore) “mommy” life instantly slapped me in the face.
If I was being honest with myself there had been an imbalance between time focused on my career vs. my time being focused as “mom”.
I had been thinking about the idea of spending time at home with Pierce, however, this was the world making it loud and clear that I needed to be there with my son.
So what have I learned through this journey to my new role of “Chief Life Officer?”
Three extremely important lessons.
The World Keeps Spinning
All of us have a little egotistical voice inside us that says when we leave a job everything at the company will fall apart. Now that is not to stay we aren’t the super glue helping hold it together at times.
However, I found out pretty quickly after leaving my career that my former company was still going strong without me.
Everything changed for me, however, very little changed for them. The world doesn’t stop spinning just because you have a major life change. Business does continue as usual so don’t take it personally if havoc doesn’t rain down when you decide to leave the workforce.
Take Time to Appreciate You
When I made the transition to be there for my son full time I forgot to take time for a very important exercise.
To appreciate me.
I realized when I was in an office environment I had more opportunities to take a moment for myself during my commute, at lunchtime, and when I ran errands for work. Now being home with my son I created a new exercise I do religiously that helps me remember, me.
At the end of each day, I think of one thing I excelled at and one thing I could have done a bit differently. Why do I do this? To remember that I am pretty awesome when at times I feel like I am far from it.
Make Your Own Celebrations
When you work in an office environment that are all types of celebrations. It is the land full of potlucks to celebrate the holidays, birthday lunches, and happy hours to cheers a big win.
When you leave the office behind though its just you, your little babe, and the cat whom I’m pretty sure is not going to be bringing me donuts thank me for being a good cat mom. I started to feel at times missing the celebrations so I created my own.
There is not a rhyme or reason to them but I feel that each day it’s important to celebrate something.
From Pierce learning a new word to us having a day with only one temper tantrum, I am learning to celebrate life.
Did my journey to stay at home go the way I thought it would go? No. But there is not a thing I would change about it. Cheers mamas ?